If you are not satisfied with the tortures inflicted upon you by “Hiss” or “Jhootha Hi Sahi”, then you can have a look at Ram Gopal varma’s “Rakta Charitra”. Though Ram Gopal Varma made it a point to do something different and out of the box, he ended up having similar kind of reviews!! How sad..

Based on a true story, the movie opens with Vivek Oberoi playing the role of Pratap Ravi. It is said that this character has been etched keeping in mind the character of Paritala Ravi,the most dreaded name in South India years back!! Oberoi is simple student leading a simple life..but all simplicity is lost once his father and brother are ruthlessly murdered by a politician from upper caste. Thus starts the blood cladded drama- the frantic search of Ravi for his enemies, his entrance in the world of Politics and then finally ending the treacherous drama by murdering the accused in broad day light.

Ram Gopal Varma in a recent interview said that “Rakta Charitra” is not a movie for women!! But the movie is so pathetic, even men will feel like running away! From the beginning to the end, Ram Gopal Varma has made it a point to show you how vibrantly and vividly “red” colour can be used.. What I mean is, throughout the movie, all you will see is blood pouring everywhere. However, to Varma this wasn’t enough, so he has all his characters using “Rakta” in almost every sentence they speak..like we use punctuation marks!! Difference in dialogues you see!!

While we have Karan Johar on one hand alluring his fans by his grandeur settings and stylish looks, we have our talented Varma showing us new ways to hurt each other. This film will definitely make you sure that he has done immense research on this!!

Varma is careful to maintain consistency!! Like all his earlier films, he has a disatrous cast, a wierd presentation, and to team up with this, there is the sweaty celebratory songs that will surely eat your head off. If there is something new in the film, it is just that the story is based on a true persn, but thats all. Don’t even think this will have some positive effect as far as the psychological state of the poor viewers are concerned!!

However, the unhinged goon, Abhimanyu Singh’s character, and Vivek Oberoi’s acting is worth the praise. But still this isn’t enough to boost you to endure the torture otherwise inflicted on you once you start watching it!! So better take Ram Gopal Varma’s advice seriously..Not only girls, but guys too!!

Himesh Reshamiya is back again to show that he isn’t bothered by the fact that people are not willing to see his movies at all!! Despite all the odds, all the rumours, the Sufi music is surely topping the charts. Himesh Reshamiya has once again successfully claimed that his music is worth the praise. However, the music doesn’t come as a saviour, because the movie is a tai tai fisss!! Its sheer wastage of money and energy.

Pooja Bhatt must find someone better to cast to atleast make her talents felt. Himesh’s expressions are so expression-less that it is difficult to understand whether he is sad, excited, happy or shocked..All the emotions have the same look!!

The story revolves around Rajiv Behl (Himesh Reshamiya) who comes from a well-to-do family. He is seen as an aimless guy, till he sets his eyes upon beautiful yet melancholic Nargis (Mona Laizza) in the pre-dawn light. He sees her in the deserted streets of Jordan and it is at the first sight he knows she is the one for him.But as fate had it to be, Nargis turns out to come from a lineage of tawaaifs from Pakistan’s Heera Mandi, and she is about to be sold to the higgest bidder. Filled with shock, distress and anger (though you will not understand when which expression is being portrayed on Himesh Reshamiya’s face..) Rajiv sets out to save his love. In the quest of his love, he discovers more about his own origin- he is actually Rocky, a pop star in U.K. He is supposed to have incurred the wrath of Baabar, the most dreaded international terrorist. After series of mindless events, Rajiv decides to turn his fate, he stops being hunted, and turns to be the hunter!! This hunter-hunted game continues, to the utter disgust of the audience, and finally Nargis and Rajiv come together, and save the viewers from losing their minds! Now that is thoughtful.

You will be be reminded of the dialogues people say when they are in love-” Every second was like a century” (without you). You will feel like saying so, but then the context will be different. Its not because you will love it, its because you will have a tough time bearing Himesh Reshamiya and his ‘passionate’ love!!

If there is one thing that will give you some minutes of comfort, then its the music. Himesh Reshamiya has blended the sufi music with the contemporary beats. His nasal tone emerged as a winner again. Set in the Arabic background, the music suits quite well with the setting! But thats all good in the movie. To listen to the music, better buy a CD, but never go to the movie hall.

Genre: Comedy
Director: Habib Faisal
Release Date: October 8, 2010

In a season of overblown action-comedies with superstars laying down the ground rules for dynamic dadagiri on the large screen, it is refreshing to see an aging world-weary working-class hero who travels to work on a rickety scooter and tries to fulfil his nuclear family’s dreams of a car.The journey from the two-wheeler to the four is what “Do Dooni Chaar” is all about.It’s just cool that it brings a smile by reminding me of my all-time favorite directors. So, with reminiscing done, we can begin appreciating what the other senior citizens are up to.

Do Dooni Chaar’ fuses two universal truths—first, everyone craves for a car today, more than being a mode of transportation, a car has become a status symbol in the present times. The second aspect centres round the thankless profession of teachers who though responsible to make good boys and good girls are not paid enough for their noble deeds. ‘So, we have Mr Santosh Duggal (Rishi Kapoor), a school teacher riding high on moral values and ethics, and his family, who now face the dilemma of upgrading their two wheeler existence to a four-wheeler one. The family gears up for their first ever big purchase in years—piggy banks are emptied, PF is encashed, a loan is in the offing, new hiding places where savings were concealed are discovered and so on.

The family even tries their luck on lucky draws and lotteries. But things do not get better. It is then that a temptation strikes the family.The lure demands Mr Duggal to adjust his ‘ethics’ a bit.But what is this temptation? Will the family take it? Check out the unexpected and hilarious situations that the family creates in their scooter-to-car journey. Watch out for the real life couple,with their heartwarming and humorous dialogues.’Mercifully, the neatly scripted but at times a little under-done film opts not to focus on the irony of a knowledge-giver’s financial burdens. Instead, the plot cleverly digs out situations where the Duggal family is shown getting into comic crises, such as the wedding at Rishi’s sister’s in-laws’ place where the Duggal parivar has to show up in a borrowed car.These situations written sensibly and enacted convincingly echo the savagery of life for the workingclass without wasting time feeling sorry for the characters.’

Not just Rishi’s character, even his wife, played by the lovely Neetu, comes across as unfussy, practical and sensible householder who makes ends meet not by the size of her husband’s income, but by a miraculous mix of common sense and uncommon guts.”Mujhe maloom hai kitni chadar phailani chahiye,” cautions Mrs Duggal, abridging a popular metaphor-‘Jitni lambi chadar ho, utna hi payr pheilao (Stretch you legs, depending on the size of your bed-sheet). Live within your salaried means. Neetu Singh, what a brilliant choice for a comeback.A perfect middle woman comes alive in Mrs.Duggal.Add the two teenage actors playing Rishi-Neetu’s son (Archit Krishna) and daughter (Aditi Vasudev) into the plot. And we are face-to-face with the Duggal’s,a real family ,as it can get in a quirky, whimsical earthy and heartwarming saga of a workingclass family.

On a level that goes beyond entertainment, “Do Dooni Chaar” is actually a timely warning to the architects of the country’s education system. The film says… don’t let the guru (teacher) become a shishya (pupil) of compromised idealism. Pay the teacher well. On the other hand, if such a reform in the educationalist’s lives really happened, we wouldn’t have the pleasure of seeing Rishi Kapoor deliver such a lived-in bravura performance.’

Go for “Do Dooni Chaar”.Its fun,its different and a good watch.If you are bored typical Bollywood Masala flicks,then ‘Do Dooni Chaar’will give you a break sure-shot. A simple yet graceful film with loads of comedy and ofcourse with an underlining serious message.

Movie: Jhootha Hi Sahi
Director: Abbas Tyrewala
Starring: John Abraham, Palki

First there was ‘Anjaana Anjaani’ telling us how important it is to live each day like it’s your last.Now there is ‘Jhootha Hi Sahi’ telling us that we have one life.Is it? Wow! Thanks for all the information!!

The film opens with a Pakistani brother-sister duo who keep saying janab and tauba to establish their nationality. There is an english fiance who keeps proposing to the pregnant Pakistani girl. There’s an air hostess who’s Abraham’s girlfriend who keeps getting called kutti-ka instead of Kruttika! And last but not the least,there are two gay friends who will eventually hook up.The hero is an under-confident, geeky, bespectacled bloke stammering before beautiful chicks. That’s supposed to be the pretty hunk John. The heroine is suicidal, but an object of instant male desires. That cutesy, Goldie Hawn’s role is played by the debutant Pakhi. You will be definitely confussed figuring out what puzzles you more: the film, or its inspired casting.

The protagonists chance upon each other through a telephonic conversation, all because his number gets mistakenly printed in an ad for a serious relationship counsel helpline specifically meant for desis at night. They hit it off instantly,i mean that too online, become friends, and then potential lovers. She doesn’t know that the confident expert on the phone she calls Fidato, and the floppy fellow Sid she meets at the coffeeshop is the same person. She developes a liking for both. He knows. He can tell her the truth. She can hear it. We can move on. They aren’t quite Sleepless in Seattle.”Fidato,” the heroine says, “It means someone you trust.” Finito, It means finished. Wish this film could figure when to.

Those who can’t have enough of John will be delighted with his dual avatars in this film. On one hand, the smart John playing adventurous psychic on the phone line making Mishka (pakhi) fall in love with his unseen self. And on the other, as the geeky bookshop owner who bumps into Mishka and doesn’t reveal his true identity to her even as he stammers and falters.There is too much of chaos over romance, friendship, comic sequences, emotional tugs- you get anything and everything but none worth enough to cast a permanent impression.The only feel good factor in the movie is the music of the film.The music is composed by A.R.Rahman and that says it all.The song, ‘Cry cry’, has hit the charts and has been favourite amongst the music lovers. The other humming number is ‘Call me dil’.Not to forget, ‘Maiya Yashoda’, is the song that has gained the film some hype.

In a recent interview to FilmiTadka, Abbas Tyrewala said that “believe me the movie ‘Jhootha Hi Sahi’ is different”, and well he is correct!! what? Not to his statement, But to the title of the movie, “Jhootha Hi Sahi”, and after enduring those torturous hours you will also say that Abbas is a Jhootha and the movie has nothing new (or different) in it.

As per Filmitadka’s rating, it is, “1 out of 5 stars; it is a torture to sit through this movie, especially if you are stupid like me to go all alone.”

What I’ll suggest for those who haven’t tortured themselves as of yet, and still wish to get seduced by John, just do one thing- Take a tub of popcorn, and dip into this, and you may find some 2 hours of fun to kill the mundane time.You can take my word!!

If some one enquires me of how i like ‘Hiss’,i’ll say shhhh,silence please.Somethings better understood unspoken! Directed by Jeniifer Lynch, the film has done a lot of news when the actress was snapped at various film festivals with pythons entwined her oomphatic body!

‘Hiss’ opens with an American (Jeff Doucette) wanting to cure his brain cancer with a nagamani, a jewel from a female cobra. He goes in quest of mating snakes in a forest and captures the malesnake so that the female one will later come slithering to him and give him the jewel to free her boyfriend. ‘If there is one thing worse than trying to cure brain cancer with a non-existent jewel, it’s trying to cure it by playing with the feelings of snakes and expecting to be alive to see yourself get cured’.The revengeful serpent turned lady is clueless as to the whereabouts of her partner.The local police (Irrfan Khan and Raman Trikha) are completely flummoxed by the grotesque murders. They soon get to the bottom of the mystery thereby discovering the truth. They find out that the snake heroine has already reached his place, and is now making love with her mate. This scene can be really weird to watch unless you’ve conceptualized it yourself, written it yourself, shot it yourself, directed it yourself, and acted in it yourself. Weird!

Mallika Sherawat has given quite a number of nude scenes to allure fans.Now, if the director’s intention was to gain more viewership by virtue of skin show, then a commercial or even a photoshoot would have sufficed. But here we have an entire movie of two hours featuring gruesome sequences where a mythical nagin kills his victims in cold blood, tear parts of their bodies and leave audiences to tolerate trash several times.Speaking of gore, Hiss delivers exactly that for you, but an even more disgusting and morbid is the hissing Mallika Sherawat!!! “Hisss”, fundamentally, is a lousy movie. There’s no story,the characters scream a lot, and the much-hyped “special effects” are ‘as entertaining as watching a garbage bin as it slowly rots.’ The result is a nonsense film that thrives on unbelievably gross visuals for the thrills.

Kooky characters abound in the script. There’s the maniacal American, a mentally-retarded mother-in-law and the childless Irrfan Khan, Divya Dutta in a household of men who brutally beat up their wives, a sapera who scares easily, and a whole bunch of several useless roadside loafs. There’s so much loud insanity all around, you won’t remember how you connected yourself into watching the movie. As for Mallika Sherawat, she hisses, shrieks and strips, and lets the cheesy graphics do the rest’.

In short “Hiss” has little to offer.Its baseless a story,inclined to nothing but all encompassing monotony.So if you have friends who insist on taking you along to watch ‘Hiss’, its time to make new ones!